11 Vintage Beauty Products That Look More Like Strange BDSM Devices
By
Muk Khatri in
History
On 6th October 2015
As a dude who uses maybe one thing that might be considered a beauty product (and that's just shaving cream), I don't know much about how the industry works today.
But I will say this: based on pictures of vintage beauty products, it seems like we've come a long way since then. These old contraptions look alarmingly similar to torture devices.
#1 The "heating mask" was supposed to increase circulation in your face.
It also made you look like you lived in a secret lair under an opera house.
#2 Although it looks like something designed by Dr. Seuss, this was actually one of the first prototypes of the hairdryer.
It was also believed to cure glaucoma, which seems random enough to sound true, I guess.
#3 The "Icall Machine" was intended to give women perms.
But if you ask me, the real purpose of this thing was to turn them into human chandeliers.
#4 These women are not the imprisoned wives of Immortan Joe and his War Boys. They're just a bunch of gals who are "exercising" with some "slenderizing machines."
These machines functioned by rubbing metal coils all over your body. Seems legit.
#5 The "magic chair" was supposed to exercise your neck, ankles, and waist -- all while sitting on your butt.
If only it worked...
#6 This was the vintage process of removing freckles with carbon dioxide.
But it honestly just looks like a cyborg sitting in a hair salon trying to play it cool.
#7 The "ice cube mask" was far from cool.
#8 Ah, the "glamour bonnet."
It was designed to improve your complexion through the use of atmospheric pressure. I would have gone with "cancer hood," but this is why I don't work in advertising.
#9 This cape would totally save women's skin from the sun and in no way associate them with ghosts or racists.
#10 They may look like Darth Maul's librarian cousins, but these ladies are actually wearing rubber masks that were designed to prevent wrinkles.
#11 The "beauty micrometer" was a steel trap of pseudoscience that was supposed to give surgeons insight into why people were ugly.
