12 Problems You’ll Only Understand If You’re Six Months Old
By
Waleed Raza in
Cool
On 2nd January 2015
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#1 You can’t control your bodily functions just yet.
#2 People keep putting wild animals into your bed as if it’s going to help you sleep better.
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#3 And they dress you up in humiliating costumes.
#4 And every time you see a new shape or colour that’s a whole new neural pathway you have to build.
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#5 Oh, and you shit yourself several times a day.
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#6 Whenever you’re crying, the big people are all “Oh no, baby, what’s wrong?” and all you want to do is shout I’M FUCKING TEETHING THAT’S WHAT’S WRONG. THERE IS ACTUAL BONE BURSTING OUT OF MY TINY BABY GUMS.
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#7 People post way too much information about you on social media.
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#8 Every now and then you catch a glimpse of another baby who looks just like you and lives in your house and it’s just more than anyone could handle.
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#9 You’re totally helpless against the plots of your older siblings.
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#10 People have started handing you something called “solid food” but you’re really not sure what to do with it
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#11 But regular clothes can be pretty dreadful, too.
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#12 That may be why you keep falling asleep in the strangest places, no matter what you’re doing, or who’s watching.
