16 People Living In A Land Of Confusion
By
Editorial Staff in
Bizarre
On 29th January 2017
Some days, it takes a little extra time to clear all the cobwebs out of your head. Like, you can find yourself stirring your coffee with your keys and making a toast sandwich (like, a sandwich where the "meat" is just a piece of toast), and get about halfway through eating it before you realized you fucked up.
We all know the brain can do some weird shit when it's on autopilot, and a day like this can make talking to people more of a hassle than it already is.
So that's what I hope is going on with these people who seemed to need some help getting their thoughts straight.
Man, do I hope that's the problem here.
#1 I'd love to know how he was able to tell her that.
Like, did he start barking as soon as she went for the top, or what?
#2 Daaaaamn, looks like we all don't know what we're really saying, huh?
I wonder how many deaf people we've been confusing this whole time?
#3 Even though it doesn't make any sense, I don't think I've met anyone who doesn't do this.
To be fair, I guess it's a little easier to think about what you're gonna do next without someone yelling about the club in your ear.
#4 Something tells me the problems started way before the child-spitting incident.
Actually, fuck the WiFi, I wanna hear the story behind that.
#5 That PG-rated action is a little too hot for this homie, I guess.
Like that part where...OK, I've never actually seen the movie but you're gonna have to work pretty hard to convince me there are scary parts.
#6 Hahaha, I didn't even notice the giant slingshot in the background at first.
Hey, I never said this land of confusion didn't have me in it.
#7 Yeah, I can't see anything going wrong with this foolproof plan.
I mean, what are they gonna do without their precious basket?
#8 Honestly, you walked right into that one.
Giving a dad an opportunity like that is just asking for trouble. Also, the hell does being shoulder even mean?
#9 Ah, is there any better moment than the ones that make you go, "wait...shit?"
Actually yeah, there are a lot, but these are OK too, I guess.
#10 Sorry pal, joke's on you 'cause that ain't even kind of right.
FYI, 13,000 pennies is only $130. But y'all knew that, right?
#11 I guess it wouldn't have thrown Jack off so much if she said her water "broke."
Ehhh, I guess you can still confuse that for her pipes bursting. Yeah, homie's gonna show up to the hospital with a monkey wrench no matter what you say.
#12 Man, I don't even know where to start with this one.
Somebody needs to explain what racism and same-sex marriage are to this person. Whoever that hero is, I hope they've got a spare three hours.
#13 Man, nothing gets by this homie.
It's like the world's most boring heckling.
#14 Whoa, I hope that plan doesn't involve driving, 'cause it sounds like that's not working out.
#15 Hmm, I don't know. Could it have something to do with the part where you cheated on him?
Nah, that couldn't be it. Dude is obviously crazy or needs a Snickers or something.
#16 Catch me on the wrong day and you'd probably get this same conversation.
Except I'd probably send like two or three before going, "wait, did you mean the car?"
