22 Shower Thoughts That Will Help Kickstart Your Day

Posted by Arsalan Ahmed in Funny
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#1 Batman is a 1 percenter beating up the mentally ill.

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#2 People today treat their bodies in a way that proves they have 100% confidence in medical science being able to fix any medical problem by the time they are 50.

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#3 No drug dealer i have ever encountered has offered me a "First One's Free to get you hooked" deal, like my school told me would happen as a kid.

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#4 There should be a website where you can sign up and swap your Halloween costume with another person every year to save yourself money.

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#5 John Cena is the new Rick Astley.

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#6 Door to door salespeople are like real life popup ads.

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#7 If humans had invented refrigeration early on, our food would be extremely bland with no cheese, cured meats, pickled veggies, smoked fish, sweet jams, and many more.

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#8 Viagra is like caps lock for your dick.

#9 When i hear the word "Egyptians" I don't think of it referring to the people who currently live in Egypt.

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#10 If the girls who strip on cam saw the guys who were watching their streams, they probably wouldn't feel the same level of validation anymore.

#11 If Kirby grew a beard it would also be his pubes.

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#12 Billionaires should give all their money to charity and start over, for fun, and call it prestiging.

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#13 It would be cool if there was a way to see how you would look like as the opposite gender, to know how attractive you are judging by your own standards.

#14 If a bigger ear implies a smaller penis, and larger shoes imply a larger penis, then clown must have a massive dick.

#15 A great name for an anal porn start would be Asterisk, because * looks like a butt hole and is pronounced like "ass tricks".

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#16 Old people don't drive slow. Slow drivers live to be old people.

#17 Porn sites should have a memories app similar to Facebook's.

#18 The human body is really quiet for everything it does.

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#19 If you kill a killer, the number of killers in the world remains the same.

#20 Any drink with calories is an energy drink.

#21 Leggings, yoga pants, skinny jeans; It's like this decade was made for the ass man.

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#22 Many people probably don't even realize how convenient it is that ears are at the perfect height of wearing glasses.

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