People Express Their Most Fulfilling Experiences Of Little Vengeance And It Gives Us Life.

Pumpkin fall display at the end of his driveway

I have a friend whose pumpkinfall display at the end of his driveway would be run over by the neighborhood jerk. Happened every year. My friend decided to put a stop to it.

He withdrew money from his savings account so he would have enough to buy the largest pumpkin he could find, along with several large bags of Quikrete. He filled that puppy up and made a real pretty display.

The jacka*s broke the axle of his shotty car when he hit that pumpkin. He could not drive away, so my friend had his car towed away, too.

Place his drink just on the handoff with no words

I used to manage a Starbucks when one of my baristas asked a guy his name and he just flipped out, belittling her, called her stupid, etc. and didn’t give a name. Anyway I take over the hand off drinks and place his drink just on the hand off with no words. (I’ll add it was a busy store with a lot of people waiting.)

I just keep putting drinks out for about 10/15 minutes and douchebag walks up and picks up his drink that’s now lukewarm and goes “Is this mine?”

I just respond with, “I don’t know it doesn’t have a name on it."

Sprite kept getting stolen even though she wrote her name all over the can

My friend’s Sprite kept getting stolen even though she wrote her name all over the can. Finally after the fifth time, it happened she got a habanero, cut it open and rubbed it all over the top of the can and left it in the fridge. We found out who the thief was when that afternoon we hear the office drama queen shriek in her cubicle and run to the water cooler. She never stole anything again.

We watched as a bunch of jerk older boys came by and kicked her castle

We were kids staying at the seaside on holiday with our family. My little sister would always make a pretty sandcastle, and the next day it would have been kicked down and she'd cry. We wanted to find out who was doing it, so one day we stayed behind to spy. We watched as a bunch of jerk older boys came by and kicked her castle down, laughing smugly.

So the next night, we covered a big beach rock in sand and decorated it. Like clockwork, the jerk kids came with their smug faces and this time kicked a solid rock with all of their might. The yowl and the look on their faces was the best revenge ever.

There's a new truck in my apartment's parking lot. Always taking up multiple spots

There's a new truck in my apartment's parking lot. Always taking up multiple spots, ALWAYS. Weird angles, close to the stairs, all over the place (no assigned parking unfortunately). Months of this.

I drive a much smaller car than that, and I'm petty/passive aggressive, I've been waiting for my chance. A few days ago was my shot.

I got home quite late and there were zero spots open in my lot. Big truck is double parked again, but there's juuust enough room on their driver side for me to sneak in there with my little clown car. I carefully pull in, making sure not to touch anything, no damage, no nothing. My passenger side mirror is half an inch from their driver side door.

I giggled to myself all the way back to my apartment and set an alarm and waited.

The following morning I wake up before the alarm to loud door slamming and stomping around I check out my window and I see the double parking culprit walking around both vehicles, taking pictures, texting someone, taking more pictures, I'm shaking with glee. They then swallow their pride, let out a visual sigh, and climb in the passenger side, clamber over the center console, and Austin Powers 20-point turn their butts out of the spot.

I've never been so proud of myself and my petty, passive aggressive ways.

Recording her mocking my hearing loss on my phone and played it for her parents

I wear hearing aids, and a girl in my high school math class used to make fun of me. I had not said two words to her and gave her no reason to do it, she was just being evil.

I recording her mocking my hearing loss on my phone and played it for her parents. They took the new car they just bought her back to the dealership.

She was the fakest and most entitled person

I had a boss 7-8 years ago whom I hated. She was the fakest and most entitled person I had ever met. One day, she decided that she didn’t like the smell of microwave popcorn...so she waved her magic office wand and had it banned.

Fast forward a month or so. I was browsing Amazon and found one of those USB sticks that emits a smell when plugged in...the smell of buttered popcorn. I bought it, plugged it into the back of her computer, and she had the sweet smell of PopSecret in her office for six months. She complained almost every day. It’s the sweetest revenge I’ve ever tasted.

Relative

An uncle of mine was a serious addict and an all around a**hole. When I was a kid it was pretty common for him to steal from my grandparents, including a lot of things they intended to give me when I was older (a coin collection, things like that). There's a long list of things he did over the course of my life to piss me off, but I'll skip to the petty revenge.

I was browsing the local county website and noticed there was a section for active warrants. I wondered if any familiar names were listed so I browsed it and to my complete lack of surprise, I saw my uncle's name listed for something minor. Then I saw the Crime Stoppers number at the top of the page. I knew where he was living at the time and it was anonymous, so what the hell? I called, described him and told them where he was. They gave me a reference number and told me to call back in two weeks.

For the sake of being thorough, I called a relative from the other side of the family who, funny enough, was not only a cop but also in charge of following up on these things. I told him the situation and he said he'd prioritize it.

Two weeks later, I call Crime Stoppers for an update and they said the tip did indeed lead to an arrest and asked which post office I preferred. I was confused but I named one. They gave me an alias, told me to give that name to the clerk and there would be a general delivery envelope with $200 cash inside. That part was unexpected but a sweet bonus for sure.

Easiest $200 I ever made.

Taking Down An Entire Study Group

I’m in a class where a group research project/presentation is a huge chunk of overall points. Everyone knows in group projects you always have that one slacker who doesn’t do anything that you have to compensate for. However, I got stuck with possibly the worst 3 people to be in a project with in the class.

I did the entire research, presentation, poster boards, etc among many other annoying things myself. I tried talking to them and telling them they needed to put in their share of effort. Ignored. I’d send them tasks to do, ignored. I’d try to schedule meetings, they’d say they were coming and then leave me alone at the library. This happened from the get go.

It was abundantly clear that they expected everyone else to do the work, but “everyone else” turned out to be just me.

Rule: We couldn’t have things 100% memorized word for word, and we couldn’t read off of anything. We had to actually know the subject. I was fully prepared to do most of the talking and even wrote down a small script for them and told them to know what to say during their part, at the very least. The night before I told them we had to meet to at least go over the whole thing one time.

Once again, none of them showed.

At this point I’m livid and decide they can just do it themselves, which means they’d get up there, not know a damn thing to say other than the small info I gave them, and couldn’t even bullsh*t anything because they did no research. Thing is, if we miss without an excuse, we fail the project. If you have an excuse, you have to have documentation. I commute and live an hour away, so I decide that I’ll conveniently have a flat tire right before class. Went out and actually bought a tire so I could have the receipt to prove it. Emailed the professor, who said I can present by myself during his office hours.

Turns out, they completely bombed, and not only probably failing the project, but since they’re bad students, might even fail the class.

Justice at the parking spot

Went to a restaurant for lunch during a work shift. Out of three parking spots somebody decided to park across every single one. There were no other parking spots at the time.

So I decided to park within half a foot from my passenger side to his driver door. Ordered and got my food, and noticed an older (60+) man leave and walk in the direction of our parked cars. When I left and walked towards my car, sure enough he was there, tray of drinks in one hands and a bag of food in the other, just absolutely struggling to get into his vehicle.

He called out about why I parked like this and my only reply was “Why did you park across three spots? Park like an a**, you better expect to be treated like one.”

How to play the game

I moved to America to be with this guy (let's call him Dick). Dick happened to work at the same big box store as my friend J, and one day when I came to meet J from work, a coworker innocently said "Are you looking for Dick? He's staying with his girlfriend."

Me: "I'M HIS GIRLFRIEND."

Now another thing you should know about Dick is he bought his toothbrushes wholesale and lived in the grungiest apartment ever. I cleaned every inch of that bathroom, toilet included, with each and every one of those remaining toothbrushes, documenting every step with photographs. Then I rinsed them in the toilet, and put them back in the box. And I packed my stuff and left.

Ten years later, when I'd calculated he was on the last brush, I sent him the pictures.

Revenge been taken

When I worked at Starbucks we had one racist and sexist costumer who always disturbed our work. He only wanted the men to make his drinks and he literally ignored the women (or said something creepy) and he didn’t want our one black guy to make his drink either.

We always gave him decaffeinated even though he asked for caffeinated. Pretty petty and childish, but it helped a little bit.

Petty revenge

Crossing at a busy downtown intersection, a very impatient driver waiting to make a turn honked at a lady pushing a stroller (she had the right of way).

I slowed down, but the guy next to me straight up stopped in front of the car, then bent down to re-tie his shoelaces.

Don't try to mess with the family

My little brother and his girlfriend came to stay at my house for the weekend, and the girlfriend was super self centered and obnoxious. When they left, she forgot her clothes and toiletries because she left them sprawled all over my bathroom.

About a week later, she and my brother moved into an apartment together. After he paid for the moving truck, deposit and utilities, she cheated on him with her ex and kicked him out of the apartment. This left him broke, homeless, and heart broken.

In the days after the breakup, she kept calling and emailing him several times per day, demanding that he ask me to ship her clothes and toiletries back to her ("I mean, it's really important. It's my NORTHFACE.") My brother called and pleaded with me to ship them to her so she would stop having a reason to contact him.

Being the loving sister that I am, I gathered up the Really Important Northface sweatshirt, shorts, underwear, shampoo, conditioner, soap and razor. I folded everything nicely. I then wrote a nice note apologizing for taking so long to mail them to her, and let her know that I hope all is well. The note was written in permanent marker, and the paper happened to be resting on the Really Important Northface when I wrote it.

Unfortunately, the ink bled straight through the paper and onto the shirt. Also unfortunately, the shampoo, soap and conditioner caps were not tightly secured on their bottles, and the contents leaked out all over the clothes, further spreading the ink. The most unfortunate result, though, was that her razor didn't have any sort of protective cap or container and left little slashes all over the front of the Really Important Northface.

She received the package, and my brother never heard from her again.

The woman’s face was enough to give me satisfaction for a week

So I’m at Costco, in need of dog food, and it’s ridiculously busy for a Monday. Barely any parking spots until I spot one at the end of the lot. I make my way down the aisle, and am about to turn into the parking spot when a lady RUNS OVER THE CURB and almost hits me to take the spot. Thankfully I tapped my brakes in time or she would have taken off my bumper.

I look up and she is shaking her head and wagging her finger in a “no” motion at me. WTF? I was like okay I’ll just wait for her to back up since I’m obviously turning into the spot. She doesn’t. My girlfriend is with me and was pissed that the lady wasn’t budging. I gave her my Costco card and just sat in the aisle in a face off with this lady. She goes inside, gets the dog food, comes back out, and loads up the car. She then pushes the cart into the spot we were waiting for and hops in the car.

The look on the woman’s face was enough to give me satisfaction for a week. She had to get out and move the cart so she could park once I reversed through the entire aisle. Worth it.