People Furious As Townsville Named Australia’s S******t Town For 2021

Posted by Sama in Bizarre On 9th January 2022
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How does it feel to win a tough competition? Well, the locals of Townsville will be able to tell you best as they managed to land the title of s**t of the year 2020. According to the locals, its worsening crime situation and constant neglect led them to win this amazing award and they are least surprised with the fact that they managed to bag it without much effort.

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We have always heard award shows for the best town or cities or countries in the world. Well, this one here is unique as it is presented to the s**t of the year and since it is not our hometown then I guess we can talk about it more freely.

To celebrate the end of what has been an absolute s***hole of a year, Townsville has been named the s******t town of the year, taking out 36.5 percent of the vote.

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Following this town, the second spot was 'the entire state of New South Wales with 30 percent, which many believe is a just call after rolling lockdowns and an embarrassing year in local politics. The third spot goes to Byron Bay with a dramatic 20 percent and Mount Druitt fourth with a less embarassing 13.5 percent.

According to local residents, their town got such worst rating thanks to the local crime. 

"I love Townsville. Like genuinely have an affinity for the place," said one commenter on the announcement. "But far out, it is ALWAYS getting on the list for some gronk doing something stupid and getting arrested for it. So I would say that this is probably fair play."

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Another resident added: "I would like to formally thank Annastacia (Palaczszuk), Scott (Morrison) and crew for their unfailing efforts in ignoring the crime situation in Townsville.

"We could not have won this amazing award without their consistent neglect."

A third Townsville fan said: "Couldn't have been anyone else. Ruthlessly consistent all year, and the sort of quality that (Port) Pirie can only dream of. Townsville deserves this championship.

Locals are also proud of the fact that their small town somehow managed to knock an entire state from the top spot, which, to be honest, is quite impressive.

In 2019, it was Queensland's Logan that took out the top spot, for the second year in a row, followed by Nimbin and Adelaide.

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At the beginning of 2021, Townsville also managed to bag another title for Queensland's S******t City with 34 per cent of the vote over Logan's 23 percent and Ipswich's 11 per cent.

"Townsville (or Towntown in English) was named after Robert Towns, a notorious slave trader who was well-known for the practice of 'blackbirding', which is Australian for abducting South Sea Islanders and forcing them to work on your sugar cane plantations," reads the review.

"In true s**t town fashion, Townsville honoured their namesake with a bronze statue for his services to racism."


Going through the city's 'oppressive heat, nightmarish disease, and wildlife that devours wayward tourists' and aggressive climate, the post also touches on the crime issues Townsville faces.'

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"Aside from being a Kmart Cairns, Townsville is known as a hotbed of youth crime and car theft, which makes it an ideal place to stop if you want an insurance payout," it added.

"Townsville is the only place in Australia where every high school has its own youth court, juvenile prison and parole office - the only reason they aren't all packed is because no one goes to school."

Well, nevertheless, this is an award and to be able to achieve it with so much competition, we salute the members of Townsville!

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