These Guys Lied To Impress A Girl, And It Backfired Spectacularly.
By
Editorial Staff in
Confessions
On 29th September 2016
As children, we're taught that lying is wrong and that honesty is always the best policy. We soon gather from our parents, older siblings, or other figures that we look up to that the line between right and wrong is not always so clear. For example, there are 'white lies,' lies that are told supposedly out of kindness. If a good friends asks if they look fat in their striped maxi skirt or if your mother asks how you enjoyed dinner, the one she spent two hours making, you might tell a white lie.
And as you grow older, you discover that some people lie about bigger things - their age, background, education, and experience. In relationships, your partner might lie about where they've been in order to surprise you or to be deceitful. Now that a majority of us are on social media, we might lie to the public to protect our privacy. In the end, our reasons for lying can all boil down to self-esteem, says Robert Feldman. We lie when we feel threatened.
Today, we're exploring lies that men have told to impress women. Some might lie about their sexual history or occupation while others will take the game of lying to a completely new level. Below you'll find some of the most extraordinary lies men have ever told for the sake of their relationships.
'I had a threesome.'
According to an article on The Frisky, one woman shared that when she first began dating her ex, he told her that he had a threesome with his college girlfriend.
Six months later, he asked if they could have a threesome because it had always been a fantasy of his. When she confronted him saying that he told her that he's already had one, he admitted that that was a lie. Needless to say, he did not fulfill his fantasy with this woman either.
'I'm straight.'
Another woman told The Frisky that her ex said he was straight. He also told her that the reason why their sex life was so bad was because her B-cups weren't large enough.
'The worst part is that I can't even hate him, because you can't hate on someone for being sexually confused, can you?' she added.
'I'm blind.'
This next one is preposterous. One man went out in sunglasses and convinced women he met that he was blind.
'I almost burst out laughing when I asked if I could feel their faces and proceeded to tell them they felt beautiful,' he shared.
'I'm a war hero.'
Roger Day, 62, was fined for wearing 17 medals to an Armistice Day parade. What's wrong with that? Well, he didn't actually earn any of them. He told his much younger wife that he was awarded these medals but lost or sold the originals, and she lovingly replaced them. He was later charged under the Military Act 1955.
'I spermed this morning.'
We're not sure what that means either but here's what happened. Reddit user Munkyspyder was about 12 years old when he learned that his friend came for the first time. Apparently, cumming was a 'manly' thing. The young boy then tried to use this as a line to impress a girl he liked.
'OMG I spermed this morning,' he told her. He didn't stop there. He also described what it felt like. 'Nothing special. I just went for my morning pee and all of a sudden it was all white...'
She told everyone about it and they all laughed at him.
'I'm small.'
When you're in junior high school, boys might lie about how large their penis is. But one guy told girls that his was incredibly small even though it was pretty average. So, when they actually saw it, they were 'impressed.'
'I live in a big house.'
Eighteen year old Todd D. Blauvelt of Gorham, New York, convinced his girlfriend and her family to move into his 6,000-square-foot house on Canandaigua Lake. He told them that he had inherited it from his grandfather, but it was all a lie. It was barely an hour after they moved in when the proper owner came to straighten things out. The young man was charged with felony burglary.
'I'm actually a hero.'
When you're drinking, bullsh*t can be hard to identify. Female reddit user val_kyrie was talking to a guy and he told her that he broke his leg after jumping in front of a car to save a kid.
'I'm ashamed to admit that I was drunk and falling for it,' she commented. 'Thankfully my friend intervened.'
'I'm your knight in shining armor.'
I saw this once on an episode of Monk but didn't realize that someone would actually do this. In order to impress his date, twenty six year old Jeffery Tyler Siegel staged a date-night attack, and it completely backfired. His friend dressed in all black and was carrying a large knife when he approached the two. The woman fled the scene and called police, and Siegel later confessed that it was all fake. His date told KAIT-TV in Jonesboro, Arkansas that they would not be speaking again.
'I can blow fireballs.'
If someone cute told you that they could blow fireballs, what would you think? Would you want to see it? Well, reddit user leftnut told a girl that he had a friend in the circus who taught him how to blow fireballs. He invited her over so that she could check it out.
'On the walk back, she was super excited about seeing the fireball, and I realized I was in trouble,' he wrote.
He then 'used the bathroom' where he looked up how to do it. He works in a lab so had some ethanol in his cabinet.
'I lit up a wick and blew a cloud of 200 proof ethanol through it. Massive fireball. IT WAS F*CKING AWESOME. No collateral damage.'
They hooked up that night.
'I won the lottery, baby!'
Howard Walmsley, 43, of Intake, Doncaster, South Yorkshire fooled everyone into thinking that he was a millionaire. He told them that he had just won the lottery. He managed to get some property, including a farm house, and other goods, telling banks and companies that he was still waiting for the money.
Even after being caught and jailed, his wife decided to stick by his side. 'He did it to keep us together,' she reflected. 'I'm standing by him.'
'I'm a chemical engineer... oh wait, you are too?!'
A user on reddit told a girl that he was studying chemical engineering to impress her. Turns out that she was studying the same thing, and he continued on trying to sound as if he knew what he was talking about.
'I can show you how to fly a plane.'
Some men think they're James Bond and Michael Santos is one of them. In 2007, Santos wanted to show his girlfriend how to fly a plane. At the time, he was inebriated. We're not sure how, but he broke into the plane, drove it around for a bit, and the left engine soon burst into flames. Thankfully, they made it out alive.
It took months before authorities caught him, but he was eventually charged with felony theft, criminal mischief, and as a habitual traffic offender. According to AP, his driving privileges have been forfeited for life.
