This Guy Threw A Tomato At Trump, The Internet's Reaction Is Incredible

By Sughra Hafeez in News On 5th February 2016
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#1 Andrew Alemao: man, myth, lege

Look at this cheeky little prick!

This is Andrew Alemao. Andrew was taken into custody on the 26th of January following a Donald Trump rally in Iowa. Why? Because this glorious son of a bitch wound up and chucked some normal tomatoes at the toupee-wearing tomato at the podium! While this feat in and of itself is enough to ensure Andrew's immortality as a symbol of civil disobedience and justice, it's more the reaction to his triumphant fruit-flinging that makes this story worth telling. Anyone can just throw some tomatoes, but the reaction to Andrew's protest is really the best part. If anyone remembers Dave Chappelle's Chappelle's Show, then you'll remember the episode with the 'racial draft,' in which the contested backgrounds of figures like Tiger Woods, Elian Gonzalez and the Wu Tang Clan were determined as if they were athletes and the different races were the teams. Well, that's what's been happening to Andrew since the Iowa incident!

#2 It started with the Mexicans!

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#3 Then Black folk started moving in on him...

#4 ...and they were going after him, HARD!

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#5 The Asian peoples put aside their differences to welcome Andrew! That's Big!

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#6 The Arabs too! This man is literally uniting the world!

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#7 Hula dancers, you say?

And, even though it took a while and a call-out before we chimed in, we finally realized that Andrew was quite possibly the realest cat we had (and that we can't really afford to lose him to another team at this point), so we busted out all the good stuff!

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#8 Now that everyone realized the whites weren't letting him go so easily, not only entire peoples, but also individual nationalities got in on it, trying to sweeten the pot!

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#9 Tell me more about these women

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#10 So...no women?

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#11 Might have to step this offer up, El Salvador. He already got offered that name!

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#12 See, now THAT'S a name!

After reviewing all of these lovely offers and they are all phenomenal as Mr. Alemao's agent, I regret to inform you that we're going to have to insist that he re-signs as 'white' for now. Everyone is obviously more than welcome to have him over whenever they want, but, let's face it, everyone, we kinda need him right now!