Toxic Friends? Here are the Signs Your Friends are Actually Terrible

A little bit of kindness puts a lot in perspective

"When I started hanging out with better people."

One user replied,

"Amazing how that works.

First time hanging out with new people, a bunch of us were in a circle chatting. I'm soft spoken, and when i accidentally got talked over, i just accepted it as always, was very used to it.

Someone in this group actually stopped them, said "hold on, what were you saying jenamac?", and the other person even apologized. It was mind blowing being heard and seen like that, and put a lot into perspective."

Reddit

Drunk friends don't necessarily make sober companions

"When I quit drinking ‘cos it was killing me. There were people I literally saw every single day who just disappeared as if by magic. 12 years ago this week, as it happens.

Edit : didn’t expect anyone to notice this, but thanks for all the nice comments - I feel I should say that I’m not anti-drink, far from it. Some people, me included, just can’t enjoy it without it becoming a problem. Everyone is different."

Reddit

Can you be angry for something that happened to someone else in 2006?

"I let my friend borrow my ps2 when I went to boot camp. When I came back, he said he sold it and gave me $50 I think? This was in 2006."

Reddit

If your friends only ever 'roast' you, then they're probably just bullies

"After I realised that other people don't shit on each other on every possible occasion in their circle. And that it isn't right when a "friend" uses every known insecurity as an argument against you when you do not behave the way he/she would want you to."

Reddit

When you feel like the friendship is not as equal as it seems

"When he does shit to me and acts like it’s no big deal, then I do the same back and he gets offended."

One user replied,

"Well duh. Punching bags arent supposed to punch back. When people view other people as things in their life they don't like it when they perform in ways they arent meant to."

Reddit

If they only call you when they want something, it's time to let go.

"They only bothered with me when it suited them, I'd rather have nobody than have to deal with that."

One user replied,

"I had the same situation. I was always the one calling or texting some friends and trying to get something going. One day I just gave up reaching out to see if they’d call me and I haven’t heard from them since."

Reddit

That's one way to end a friendship

"When they robbed me at gunpoint."

Reddit

This is just terrible on every front.

"She got a boyfriend and would let him listen to our phone calls and not tell me, even if I was crying about personal stuff that I would only ever tell her. Then they both started lying to me about my crush liking me back, forcing both him and me into awkward positions (telling everyone we liked each other so they'd play along, swapping places constantly to make us sit next to each other, pressuring him into giving me a lap dance, making him kiss the prettiest girl in the room, etc), and encouraged me to shoot my shot more and more."

Reddit

"All the while they knew he didn't like me, he had told them both directly. One night I was crying on the phone cause I was so confused why my advances weren't working, and they just kept explaining it away, blaming some other bullshit reason and telling me to try again. The next day they told me they were laughing throughout the whole call, because I didn't get it and I was so upset. I should add I had no dating experience at all and nobody had ever liked me at this point."

If they can't be there for you when you need them, then what's the entire point of friends?

"2006 my then best friend wanted to go to a big German metal festival. I did not want to go because my Dad had endstage cancer. Dad died August 8th, couple of days after friend returned from the festival and I called him because I needed someone to talk."

"He very bluntly stated that he had no interest in my Dad's passing but wanted to tell me how great the festival was. You can't imagine how disappointed I was. For years I've been there for him whenever he got dumped and the one time I needed a friend he wasn't there for me. Told him to shut my door from the outside and loose my number..."

Reddit

A financial crisis really shows you which ones are the real ones.

"When they stopped being my friends after I went through a rough financial patch."

Reddit

The lack of awareness on this one is just astounding

"When he didn't invite me or even tell me about his wedding but called on the wedding day and asked me to lend him $1000 because he was in a tight spot."

Reddit

Helping ≠ Bullying

"They were picking on a member of our group for random crap (eg her hair, her clothes etc). I snapped and told them to stfu and that they sounded like a band of hyenas, and they said "if she doesn't know how shit she is, her life will be hard, we are HELPING her".

Needless to say we didn't keep in touch afterwards."

Reddit

Sometimes an entire group can turn on you and you may never even get closure

"When they cut my out all of the sudden. I had been friends with these guys for 10 years then one day they all up and left blocked me on everything. I have been questioning if I am a horrible person."

Reddit

When friends take part in power plays, it's time to walk away

"When I told my friend I was completely in love with this girl and also told him that I’ve been battling depression for 2 years as well as thinking about killing myself. Then found out that not even 2 weeks after I told him all this he starting hooking up with the girl and then would brag and talk about her in front of me as if he had no idea about how I felt."

Reddit

It's a simple but effective method.

"I stopped texting everyone all at the same time, I never heard from any of them again."

Reddit