Unspoken Things Men Had Done To Their Manhood

#1 Towel service… Regrettably paper towel only

#2 Yoga. Pulled it until it hurt just to see how far it can go.

It's not like we decide it's time to do penis stretches whenever we're alone, but we've attempted this once.

#3 VROOM VROOM! Use it as a gearshift and make car noises and pretend that you are racing.

#4 Measure it. It is impossible to have a penis without taking a tape measure to it. We need to know the number.

#5 Make a hotdog with your balls. You can wrap your balls onto either side of your penis and it basically forms a genital hotdog.

#6 Try and fit it in things. If you have a penis you’re going to see what it does (or more importantly, doesn’t) fit into.

Paper towel rolls, apple pie etc.. The less it can fit into, the better you feel.

#7 Look and talk to it. Do I have to go into more detail here?

#8 Crazy glue. Multiple streams, triple or even worse

#9 Self Pleasure..

#10 Caught in a zipper, now wearing underwear is a must.

#11 Give it a name. The Hulk or the Flash.

#12 No Matter how hard you shake.

#13 Pube gets under the foreskin, kind of cuts into the head all the while pulling the hair out.

#14 If it sticks or isn’t in a comfortable spot, it’s annoying as hell