Woman Asks How To Support Husband Mourning Dead Mistress

Posted by in Social Issues On 2nd October 2021
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Woman asks internet for advice on what to do after finding out that husband’s deceased co-worker was actually his mistress.

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The original screenshot was shared by user @aliyajmari which said,

“Three months ago, the woman who was having an affair with my husband died suddenly from an accident. I found out about the affair only two days after her funeral. I thought she was simply a co-worker and I was wondering why my husband was so disturbed and emotional. He quit his job saying it was too traumatic to go back to work. She was in the early weeks of pregnancy when she died and my husband doesn’t know whether he or the husband was the father. So, on top of everything he’s also grieving for a baby that may or may not be his.”

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She went on to ask how to help him deal with the situation which had everyone rather baffled.

“I find it extremely difficult to be emotionally supportive when he wakes up at 3 am crying and trembling yet I don’t have the heart to yell at him like I want to,”

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“He says she’s dead so there’s no reason for me to feel jealous or threatened and asks for my understanding as he grieves. We’ve barely talked these last few weeks because I don’t know how to respond to my husband when he cries and says he misses her and wishes she were here., then also how much he loves and that he never intended to leave me.”

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The anonymous woman who seems to have the patient of a saint also offered to go to marriage therapy and work on it together.

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“I asked him to visit a marriage therapist together and he said he’s ‘not ready’ to work on our marriage, and thinks he needs to see a grief therapist instead. Do I need to give him time to mourn the loss of his mistress? Or should I demand he focus on our marriage?”

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People couldn't understand how the woman was not considering divorce.

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Most were convinced that the ship had sailed on the relationship.

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The OP then posted the response that the professional gave to the woman. Their response was much the same but asked a very important question. Did the husband of the mistress ever find out about the affair?

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