This user asked in a reddit post whether she was the AH after wearing white to a wedding where the bride was blind.
Woman Wears White To Blind Cousin's Wedding, Doesn’t Understand Why She’s The A**hole.
The story begins with Reddit user giving context that her cousin is blind from birth and that the two weren’t particularly close growing up.
“I'd like to start by saying that me and my female cousin (blind from birth) aren't very close but we get along well as relatives. She's 26 and her wedding was last week. She sent me an invitation though we don't talk much but since I wanted a break from work I decided to go.”
She proceeds to say that the wedding party was rather small because of circumstances and that she decided to wear her favourite colour which also happened to be white.
“My favorite color is white. (I have brown skin) love wearing white because it brings out my skin glow and makes me feel comfortable and confident. I purchased a maxi white dress, nothing fancy but goes well with my skin tone and wore it at the wedding. There wasn't a big party with many guests. But sort of family dinner and small celebration. I really thought no one would even noticed I was wearing white.”
For anyone who has attended even a single wedding, they know that wearing white on someone else wedding day is a huge no-no.
Her cousin who is blind obviously did not know that she was wearing white but the bride’s mother was offended throughout the dinner by this egregious faux pas.
“My cousin and her husband didn't know because obviously, no one told them. But My aunt kept giving me uncomfortable looks the entire evening. And so did my other cousin. Once I decided to leave. My aunt pulled me aside and berated me for wearing this color at her daughter's wedding. She said just because her daughter is blind doesn't mean she's stupid and doesn't know whats going on around her. basically saying I brought negative energy and disturbed the celebration by having guests notice and by extension, my cousin as well. She gave a lengthy lecture and asked if I hate to see her daughter happy and whether I pulled this stunt because my "blind" cousin got married before me. I was like woah calm down none of this was true. I just wore my favorite color and didn't do it because my cousin is blind and wouldn't notice. And married before me? I never thought of that. I argued with my aunt for trying to dictate what I wear but she defended herself saying I was a guest and should have respected the bride. I left feeling very upset and exhausted from that encounter.”
The Reddit user then continues to consult her boyfriend who also tells her that maybe wearing white at your blind cousin’s wedding was probably not the best idea.
“My boyfriend said he believed I used the fact that my cousin is blind to wear white but this didn't fly with her family. He pulled the "I told you so" line and said I just made my family hate with that stunt. Even though he knows that I always wear white but he warned me that if my cousin finds out there's going to be some issues. He suggested I get ready to apologize but I really see no reason to apologize since I chose to wear a comfortable color that I feel confident in.”
People of course were not having any of it and any of the spiel she had about wearing what she wants and not wanting people to police her outfits, the final verdict was that she was in fact, TA.
Unfortunately, the message still did not get across as she posted a later update to the post where she said,
“EDIT: WTH? I'm seeing some angry folks here getting too much upset over this matter. I honestly never cared about this stuff but obviously a lot of people do. I just think its ultimately my choice to wear what I want whenever I go especially since I wasn't taking any part of the wedding but seeing how many people care about minor stuff like that then I guess I didn't think this through.”