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#1 A hug and my adoration are *free*.
#2 Spam is awesome, right guys?
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#3 I have always found people blatantly ignoring me to be kind of shitty tbh.
#4 I also hate salmon-colored borders on stuff.
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#5 I have Dreams.
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#6 I’m the boss.
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#7 Free things scare me.
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#8 YOLOSEC: You Only Live Once, So Eat Cheetos.
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#9 It is for an improve comedy troupe, after all.
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#10 Clean inbox, or 20% off whatever “Quirky” sells? You decide.
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#11 I am the customer, and the customer is always right.
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#12 Presumptuous wench…
#13 Which, y’know, is a little weird considering I’m a dude.
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#14 *Rude*.
#15 I reject my $3 off coupon?
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#16 Nailed it.
#17 Wow, this one got existential.
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#18 Psh, who would want that? Not this guy…
#19 Worse than a clingy significant other.
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#20 It’s just so much easier to take naps here.
