#1 Andrea Leadsom says she'll bring back fox hunting to improve animal welfare
Did...did anyone tell her that's not how it works?
#2 New York City gives $78 million worth of tax breaks to dead people
But the living are screwed.
#3 Delta Plane Mistakenly Lands at South Dakota Air Force Base
Hopefully the pilot didn't say, "uh oh" over the intercom.
#4 Council staff had to watch hundreds of hours of explicit CCTV for lap dancing club case, court hears
"Darn honey, I have to work late again."
#5 St. Louis-area woman on ISIS hit-list told to "arm up"
The only thing worse than Jehovah's witnesses knocking on your door to give you this information is an FBI agent telling you this.
#6 Teenager's love of hummus leads to near fatal shooting in Cincinnati
Ground chickpeas are serious business.
#7 Microsoft invites ‘bae’ interns to ‘get lit’ on ‘lots of dranks,’ then apologizes — again
So. Much. Cringe.
#8 Police: Using cane to operate car, paraplegic leads Portsmouth police on high-speed chase
When there's a will...
#9 South Carolina town bans saggy pants, $600 fine for repeat offenders
This is what we've come to.
#10 'Kerry snail' blamed for 45-minute traffic jams – Healy Rae
I knew it. I freaking knew that all of the traffic can be traced back to one person.
#11 Seagull drone poops sunscreen...uh, thanks
Such a wonderfully gross idea.
#12 Man injured after bullets thrown into Canada Day bonfire
The bullets later apologized.
#13 St. Petersburg homeowner discovers soda-stealing burglar petting the family dog
This criminal's all right.
#14 Buc-ee's Demands $67K Back From Ex-Employee Because She Left
Can she make a countersuit claim on the basis of their stupidity?
#15 Treating alcoholics - with wine
This will end well.
#16 Would-be Colorado Springs carjacker foiled by total inability to drive stick
"He just...totally sucks at driving cars." - What I would say if I was the cop giving a press conference on this sad, sad event.
#17 Indigenous woman yells 'I hate white people' before punching white woman, but it's not a hate crime judge rules
Come on, this sh*t goes both ways.
#18 Vegans go on the offensive over advert starring Lee Lin Chin, a bowl of kale and a flame thrower
Vegans, getting pissed off about something? What else is new?
#19 Fired Fort Lauderdale cop brings black girlfriend to hearing to prove he's not racist
"See! I'm screwing one of these people!" Is what he probably said.
