Dean Ambrose Starting His Own Gym!

Posted by Editorial Staff in Sports On 28th November 2016

Step inside the Ambrose Asylum and see how The Lunatic Fringe gets into fighting shape.


You gotta Garage? You gotta Gym!

Dean Ambrose is one of the best wrestlers around! What could make him better? He's starting his own gym in his garage. For who you ask?


Dean Ambrose Dad Bod Buffer Gym

The gym is for balding fathers who have kids that look up to Dean Ambrose. He got the idea from watching a dad and son at Money in the Bank night. The son was on his fathers shoulders falling off and couldn't grab onto his father's hair to stay up. The son then yelled "I wish my dad was Dean Ambrose!" And then asked for money to get a hotdog.


Ambrose bald/soft spot

Seeing this disaster made him think of how successful he was with having his receding hairline and took action. Next thing we know Dean Ambrose Dad Bod Buffer was born. The main ingredient to make this so great? Wigs.

Ambrose Aerobics

This gym has everything. The wigs give the dads confidence while they workout and there's only one mirror so they don't have to feel ashamed the whole time they get buff. The Ambrose Aerobics class is mainly just dancing to System of a Down songs that they can stop and complain to. This gives them an outlet for their miserable lives at home with their cheating wives and spoiled adult kids.


Dean Machine

The Dean Machine is basically just Dean's mom that fits the Dads into better looking dad pants. She's an expert on what balding men should be wearing because her husband and was the same way. She cheated on him and nagged him to death so she devoted her life to making other dads feel better about their pant selection.

One wig fits all

While some gyms don't always work for certain body types, these Dean wigs fit every dad's lifestyle. Here's a picture for reference if you don't believe in real results of a hard workout. So if you're a father losing hair, hateful kids, and a wife that just can't keep it in her pants for everyone but you, this is the gym for you!