Images That Prove That Your Childhood Celebrity Crush Has Not Aged Gracefully

By Michael Avery in Entertainment On 3rd October 2017
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Christina Aguilera: Has seen better days

Can we just say it? What in the hell happened? There is no bottle in the world big enough to house Christina Aguilera and what she has morphed into today. Furthermore, there’s no Genie that could undo the damage done to that face. Alright, maybe she was a little bit mousy before, but she was cute. She was tiny. She was well-proportioned. Just as it happens with most young starlets who are introduced to the white-hot lights of Los Angeles too soon, Christina jumped at the chance to tweak her body and reshape insecurities she had. The person she is today is more closely resembling Hatchet-Face from John Waters’ Crybaby. Somewhere inside of there lies the Disney pop princess we once knew, but it appears this new Christina ate her.

Amanda Bynes: Classic child-star woes

From Nickelodeon to the nickel and dime store, Amanda Bynes has most certainly seen better days. Unfortunately, Amanda suffered a mental breakdown over the last decade. We should’ve seen it coming. All the signs were there. She was arrested for possession of marijuana, as well as tampering with evidence — said evidence being the bong she threw out of her NYC apartment window. Bynes’ erratic behavior doesn’t stop there. She was arrested for DUI and two separate events in which she hit another vehicle and fled the scene soon followed. In recent years, she’s been abandoned by her agent and her publicist. In other words, she’s not bringing in any dough — except for the tabloids of course. Today, Amanda bounces back and forth between platinum blonde and pink hair — some of which are wigs. She’s added a few piercings to her appearance and seems comfortable stepping out in sweats on a regular basis.

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Mary-Kate and Ashley Olsen: 31 or 85 years old? We can’t tell

Two for the price of one, right? In their earliest years, Mary-Kate and Ashley Olsen were the famed twins who played Michelle Tanner on Full House. Today, they’re busy maintaining the empire that they spent their entire childhood cultivating. They’ve spent their entire lives side-by-side, being compared, contrasted, and ridiculed. Back in 2004, Ashley checked herself into a rehabilitation facility after admitting to struggling with anorexia nervosa. While mental illness is no joking matter, her gaunt appearance left fans to wonder what the hell was going on. Mary Kate is no image of perfection, though. Young boys growing up in the nineties fell in love with this dynamic duo. Their adorable childhood looks seemed to give way to less than favorable appearances as adults, though. Seriously, why do they look like they’re fifty-years old?

Lindsay Lohan: Too far gone

While she wasn’t much to look at when The Parent Trap remake made its way to theatres, Lindsay Lohan quickly blossomed into the new it girl. Every guy wanted to date her and every girl wanted to be her. The release of Mean Girls in 2004 kicked off a career for this Disney starlet that she never saw coming. Lohan went from being a spunky, freckle-faced redhead to someone that appeared to be more alike to the girls working Sunset Strip. The fame and fortune clearly went to Lilo’s head. At the same time, her family life was falling apart behind the scenes. Her parents are addicts who have attempted to exploit their daughter and rob her blind. Lindsay has been arrested multiple times for drinking and driving, drug abuse and theft. She’s violated the terms of her probation. She’s cursed at her boyfriend on Twitter. She’s a damn mess is what she is!

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Brendan Fraser: 6-Pack to keg size

It’s official. Brendan Fraser is old enough that we can claim he was once a teenaged heartthrob — a word not often used within today’s messed up world of Internet lingo. Come on, he was Tarzan. In the 1990s, Fraser was up on a pedestal with stars like George Clooney and Tom Cruise. Today, it seems they’ve all fallen from grace. While George Clooney appears to just be an asshole at times, and Tom Cruise is an insane Scientologist, Brendan Fraser just looks like a regular guy — and that’s pretty much why he’s made the list. Look, celebs aren’t allowed to look like regular people. They need to be pictures of perfection, even when they fall out of the spotlight. Brendan Fraser somehow went from the hot guy from The Mummy to some dude with a dad bod. Gross!

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Tara Reid: All around train wreck

In her early years as one of the hottest girls in cinema, Tara Reid was the ultimate girl next door. Her rockin’ body paired with the role of the sweet virgin that isn’t giving it up just yet in American Pie had men everywhere wanting more. Unfortunately, there wasn’t much more in store for Tara in the film world. While she had a raspy voice that men loved and the allegedly perfect body — even opposite of Shannon Elizabeth’s at the time — acting wasn’t really her fortè. Today, Tara is pretty much the reverse of a butter-face. In other words, her face is the only place she’s got it goin’ on. Unfortunately, she seems to think she needed a little nip and tuck way too early in her life — and she didn’t research her surgeon very well before jumping in head first. Go check out what’s left of her abs.

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Jessica Simpson: Trying to bounce back

To be fair, Jessica has really whipped herself into shape in recent years. She’s back at the Weight Watchers game and the pounds have melted off of her tiny frame. Still, it didn’t happen overnight, though it sure seemed like her weight gain did. Jessica fell victim to one of the oldest tricks in the book: pregnancy. Motherhood doesn’t bestow large bosoms and supercharged metabolisms upon all of us. Jessica discovered this the hard way. She believed in that old myth about eating for two, and she did it well — regrettably. Jessica joined Weight Watchers after the birth of her daughter, Maxwell in 2012. Following such, she lost more than 50 pounds and became a spokesperson for the company. But damn, those fat years are going to haunt her. Since then, she got pregnant with her son, Ace and gave birth without much fuss over her weight. We just hope it stays that way. Our men need her and her daisy dukes, supposedly.

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Rob Kardashian: His Family Brought Him Down

What can we say about Rob Kardashian? Once upon a time, he was the adorable younger brother to the Kardashian sisters that K-dash fans everywhere we ogling over. He was fit and didn’t seem to need to work at it. What young twenty-something does? We still aren’t 100% about what went wrong with Robert. Some sources claim bipolar disorder and other forms of mental illness took control of him, causing him to spiral into a downward depression. Others claim he was abusing drugs with his roomie, Lamar Odom. It’s up for speculation. What isn’t a secret is how much Rob started to rely on food to comfort his sorrows. His weight has ballooned in the last few years, and he has most certainly garnered some negative attention because of it. Sadly, that attention only seems to make Rob feel worse about himself. We’re pulling for you, bro!

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Haley Joel Osment: Child Star Gone Wrong

With a name like that and that telltale baby face, young girls and adults alike fell in love with Haley Joel Osment from an early age. He was just 11-years old when he was cast in the role as Cole Sear in M. Night Shyamalan’s The Sixth Sense. His aptitude for serious acting and raw emotions rocked us to our cores. Was he another Macaulay Culkin? Where would life take him after such a hit blockbuster thrust him into the spotlight? With a net worth estimated at over $12 million, he’s certainly invested his time well in a variety of films that made their way to the silver screen. What he hasn’t done well is keep in shape. The small, fragile boy that played Cole Sear is long gone now. Osment has publicly remarked that he isn’t the same person who played that part — almost as though he’s trying diligently to cut ties with the child star image. Today, he’s a pretty rounded out individual — literally, and is in need of some serious grooming before he’s date-worthy.

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Lil Kim: Her face has changed 20 times

While ‘Lil Kim seemed like a fitting name in the 90s, Kimberly Jones — her real name — somehow seems to suit her better nowadays. This rap star turned fashion mogul was sweet and petite at one time. Always dressed to the nines, Kim was rarely seen without full hair and makeup. Hey, some of her most adoring fans are all about her new look. They love the curves, but any good reality TV junkie worth their salt knows you’re not even in the game today if you haven’t had a little body contouring. With her short stature, all those added curves make her look a little bit on the large side. Kim showed up at the BET awards over the summer wearing a bejeweled jumpsuit that was totally see-thru. It seems that despite her interest in adding some curves and thicker brows to her wardrobe, she’s still all about flaunting it. Sorry, Kim, not every guy wants that much junk in the trunk.

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Val Kilmer: Not even the same person anymore

Let’s be frank. No one saw this coming. The progression was slow. We saw it all happening, and yet we were powerless to stop it. Once the apple of every woman’s eye, Val Kilmer is a pale version of what he used to be. While his chiseled features and trademark lips had once made him into the hottest Batman ever, he looked more like your drunk uncle at Thanksgiving these days. WTF, Val? Is it too much to expect that you not let yourself age? To be fair, Val let himself go in some pretty extreme ways. A lot of stress and boozing it up doesn’t help matters. We can’t very well expect men in their fifties to look the same as they did in their thirties, but if Richard Gere serves as any proof, we can expect them to look better. Sorry, Val.