Need To Get Out Of A Ticket? These 10 Cops Show How You Can

By Muk Khatri in Funny On 1st September 2015

#1 Never flirt or bribe.

"I feel when women show some skin or someone tries to bribe me with money it insults my integrity, and that is a guaranteed ticket as well."

#2 Don't be an asshole.

"You can tell someone is having a shitty day and maybe decide not to give the ticket. Just don't be an asshole. You have no idea how often someone who wasn't going to get a ticket ends up getting one based on their attitude or arguing with me."

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#3 Don't give them crazy excuses.

Something like, "yeah, it's possible I was going a little over the limit, I thought I was keeping with the flow of traffic" will suffice.

#4 Never admit to your violation.

Never admit to speeding because then they have to give you a ticket because you admitted guilt.

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#5 Keep your eyes to yourself

"Don't stare at the officer in your side view or rear view. We notice this every time, it looks suspicious and some officers will be more on the defensive."

#6 Politely suggest just getting a warning.

"A simple, 'Would you consider giving me a warning?' worked many times. Warnings count toward my monthly quota. If you admit to being guilty by saying, 'I wasn't paying attention, the speed got away from me,' I'm going to write that in the notes section of the ticket for when I testify. That's my job."

#7 Don't do anything to make them feel threatened.

"Traffic stops have high potential to be dangerous. As a county police officer, a majority of my traffic stops are just to try and find someone with warrants for their arrest, narcotics or something else. If they are in the clear, I let the person go without issuing a ticket."

#8 Don't be a diva.

Saying these things will never get you out of a ticket: "Do you know who I am?" "My tax dollars pay your salary!" "I know the chief/the county executive/a judge." "Don't you have anything better to do?" "Shouldn't you be out catching real criminals?"

#9 Wave when you see a cop.

"He will either think that you know each other and wave back, or will think that you're acknowledging that you were driving too fast, and are letting him know that you're slowing down."

#10 Know that your car says a lot about you.

"You want to say "I'm a reasonable and law-abiding," not "I hate the police, speed, and I'm trying to hide something from you."