People Having A Terrible, Horrible, No-good Day

By Annie N. in Funny On 21st December 2021
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Well, that's one way to keep your car clean

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“Tried to save a few trees and bought a silicone “cotton swab”. Guess who’s in urgent care because the other end is stuck in his ear?”

1 tree = 1 ear, that's the deal.

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“Last one out for the weekend and I don’t have the key.”

There's only two ways out of this and both of them expensive.

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“Some people tonight paid $40 to park on a grass lawn for a concert only to find afterwards a tree parked on their cars.”

The tree was just doing a trust fall into the cars.

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“Found this in the washing machine in my building.”

You can no longer watch R-rated content on that tv.

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“My car is on the other side of this group of assholes. Send help.”

RIP to this guy's ankles

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“Ate half of the bag before I actually looked at them.”

That one's going to destroy his insides

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“Well. My catalytic converter’s gone.”

They left the rims though.

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“Fried mushrooms for an omelette, realized I’m out of eggs.”

See this as an absolute win.

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“I need this for school. I don’t have the money for a new one.”

Have you tried slapping the shit out of it?

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Kevin from the office flashbacks

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“Got back to hotel after working 12hrs to find that they bagged all our stuff into a trash bag & gave our (paid for) room away. Thanks Choice Hotels."

You did this for what?

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“I was trying to microwave milk.”

The milk was having none of it that day.

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"Healthy living isn't available in your country"

Yeah, that's why I don't work out. Not because I'm lazy.

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“What’s left of the chopping board I melted after preheating the oven. I’m tipsy so this is funny for now…”

Everything's funny until you sober up.

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Take away his college fund.

“Neighbor’s 12yo grandkid decided to sneak in the car and take a joyride. Freaked out, hit the gas, and crossed their lawn and mine to hit the front of my house.”

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Utterly tragic.

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“My basement got a little wet.”

Just a smidge

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“Fell asleep making some Mac n Cheese.”

The mac and cheese were making their way straight into hell.

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“Nothing better to start your morning than dropping a full jar of glitter.”

This person will be finding glitter on themselves till the day they die.

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What's scarier than a spider is a lost, cleansed and moisturised spider.

“I had a cleanser leak in my sink. A couple days later I came across this… don’t know where the spider is now, but I can only assume she’s angry and a superhero now.

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“Mcdonalds left a label in my burger.”

That's how you know it's fresh

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“A moose broke through a window and entered a school in Saskatoon today.”

He wanted to graduate

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