Don't cook without clothes on. Seriously. Just don't do it.
#1 She needs twerk insurance.
There have actually been deaths related to twerk-accidents. One such twerking catastrophe occurred in 2012 during a notorious incident at a club Funkapuss in SC. several participants in a twerking competition attempted a cheer-leading style "twerk pyramid" consisting of 24 women piled on top of each other. 3 women died and 17 were seriously injured after the configuration toppled.
#2 Your kitchen is trying to kill you.
Over 1.69 MILLION ER visits are related to men over 15 cutting them with a knife in the kitchen. That's ONLY the knife related accidents.
#3 That's some good bread!
There are actually more than 300,000 door-related injuries requiring emergency room treatment take place each year. Children, especially those under the age of four, suffer most door-related injuries that ultimately require amputation.
#4 Sounds like you need calcium.
Brittle bone disease is a disorder that results in fragile bones that break easily. It's typically present at birth, but it only develops in children who have a family history of the disease.
#5 Fork it!
A fork is a pole weapon which was used in war, in Europe between the 15th and 19th centuries. Not the same as what we eat with, but hey. The more you know!
#6 I doubt he will ever live that down.
#7 At least you were already there.
There's at least 1307 deaths from falls on the stairs a year.
#8 Not that much they can do for that.
#9 That wasn't a bright idea.
#10 That's what she said.
#11 Oh crap. That hurts to think about.
#12 Don't attempt to try this at home.
#13 Standing... it's hard.
#14 You deserved that. N'sync is horrible.
#15 Maybe wear steel-toed boots when you dance with the toe stomper.
#16 That was asking for it.
