16 Signs That You Are A Full-Fledged Drunk Person

#1 You think you're the richest person in the world.

But you're actually just the dumbest.

#2 You ask the Domino's guy to pick up McDonald's for you.

That's what the "special instructions" field is for.

#3 You pee behind the tent at a wedding.

Pretty sure this is how they came up with those Calvin-peeing-on-a-Ford-logo stickers for the back of your truck.

#4 You convince the ATM to get drunk with you.

There's no way the dirt that splattered on your bike also got on your slice.

#5 This found its way onto your Amazon wish list.

Ahoy matey! Cocktails off the starboard bow!

#6 The cops need to be called because you got trapped in a baby seat at McDonald's.

This baby has had enough ba-ba.

#7 You think pizza can double as a street pillow.

I had a dream that my face broke out with crazy acne.

#8 And a table can double as a blanket.

It's so warm.. it's two-ply!

#9 This will do as a can opener.

Bread knife beats rock.

#10 You are capable of impossible feats of greatness.

Be proud, your accomplishment is grand.

#11 You have the best plan to keep the room from spinning

We call this the couch hug.

#12 You did... this.

#13 This is how you set an alarm clock.

It's yam and I'm drunk.

#14 You have to write apology notes like this:

Bless this mess.

#15 You want to freehand tattoo a black Charmander on your stomach.

The flame kinda makes it, though.

#16 You convince the ATM to get drunk with you.

Also a great way to keep your money wet!