20 of the Most Annoying Things You Deal With Every Day

#1 Smudged to Imperfection

It's not a big deal. It's just a bunch of smudges that are making your Ipad look less desirable. It's just smudging up perfection. No need to panic. Remain calm. All is well.

#2 I AM TRYING TO RELAX!!

And you know you're not getting back up again to get it. So you just lie there in bed, not sleeping and mad at the world.

#3 Don't Make Me Unfriend You

Let's just clear this up right now: In the history of social media, no one as ever accepted a Facebook invite to play any game...EVER. So take your ball and go home.

#4 School's Out 4 Ever

This is the reason I did so poorly in high school. It had nothing to do with my study habits or the fact that I'm not smart. It was because of this.

#5 Don't Go Green. Go Red (With Rage).

It's only slightly less annoying than running out of printer ink on the very last page of your finally finished, 173-page screenplay about vampire-werewolves but, still, this will curl your toes.

#6 Not a Keeper

Toss it. Just get rid of it. The pain and suffering you'll have to go through to untangle this is just not worth it.

#7 Pencil, We Need to Talk

Hey Pencil,

Listen, I know I don't use you much anymore and, if I'm gonna be honest here, this is one of the reasons why. You have one job and if you can't do that one job, then I am done with you. Go ahead and move your stuff out of the apartment tomorrow morning while I am gone.

#8 Eat Things the Right Way!!

It's called "String Cheese," not "Chomp Cheese." We're not Neanderthals here, people.

#9 Bad For #1 or #2

Either way, the experience will annoy you. Better to just hold it until you get home. (Unless this is your home. Then, you're screwed.)

#10 A Spoonful of Sugar...Will Make Your Spirit Wither

Each grain of sugar stuck on to this spoon represents the thousands of co-workers dissatisfied with their career choice.

#11 The Conspiracy Theories Are True

The greatest scam in food history: the newly opened, yet only half-full bag of chips. They say it's because the air provides an "air cushion" that prevents potato chips from becoming potato crumbs. But we all know the truth, right? It's the aliens from Mars trying to destroy our moral before they take over.

#12 Passive Aggressiveness in Liquid Form

"I would rather dehydrate than refill the water filter.That's how much my principles mean to me, and that's how mad I am at you."

#13 Not on My Watch

I promise you on all that is holy on this big blue marble, I would never let this happen if we lived together. That's my promise to you: as a friend, as a roommate and as a lover.

#14 Did They Not Hear "Hollaback Girl" by Gwen Stefani?

She sings, "These bananas/B-A-N-A-N-A-S." She does not sing, "These bananas/B-A-N-A-N-A-Apostrophe-S." Look to Gwen for all your grammar needs.

#15 Time Is so Not on My Side

Listen, we know that cleaning the office microwave is too much to ask. No one wants to be saddled with that chore and that is fine. But, for all the sake of office morale, could you please just reset the timer when you are done cooking your Lean Cuisine? It's a little thing but it goes a long way towards hating you less.

#16 Wrong Straw = Poor Life Decision

Choosing the wrong straw for your iced frappuccino can have a worse, longer lasting effect on your emotional psyche than choosing the wrong person to love. That's not just me talking: Any mental health professional will tell you that.

#17 Press 1 if You Need a Punch in the Face

"You've pressed one to have your face punched. I am sorry, but no one is available to punch you right now. Please stay on the line and the next available operator will be able to assist you in the punching of you face."

Smooth jazz then plays for the next 27 minutes.

#18 The Busiest Person on the Planet

"You know, I would love to return my shopping cart to the proper area, but I am just soooooo busy. My life is filled with such busy-ness that I really don't have the time to be considerate. If you were as busy a person as me, you would totally understand."

#19 Everybody Freeze!!!!

Every time you see this, your soul dies just a little bit more.