22 Parents Share The Weirdest Things Their Kids Ever Did

1. “As if that wasn’t strange enough…”

"On a camping trip my son pretended a tree branch was his girlfriend. As if that wasn't strange enough, he later ran up to me while I was talking to a stranger and announced, ‘I have to go bury my girlfriend now.'"

Cassie Kent

2. “She takes it into the bathtub with her.”

"For the last year and a half my three-year-old daughter has been playing with a plastic bloody severed foot. She takes it into the bathtub with her and pushes it around in her doll stroller."

Kimberly Lockert

3. “I then noticed my son sitting at a table, looking sad…”

"I was picking up my son from kindergarten when I noticed that all of the kids leaving his class had mustaches drawn on their faces. I then noticed my son sitting at a table, looking sad, with a huge handlebar mustache drawn on his face. Turns out he'd gotten in trouble for starting ‘the mustache club' and drawing mustaches on his classmates with a marker (some by force)."

Kyli Jo Crawford

4. Worms, worms, worms.

"My three-year-old son began crying inconsolably upon learning that worms don't have brains like humans, and thus couldn't ‘really be his friends.'"

Chloe Peterson

5. Spaghetti-nator.

"I walked in on my son threatening his spaghetti and saying he was gonna kill it."

Riley Miller

6. “I never figured out his thought process behind that…”

"My son opened my underwear drawer and poured chocolate syrup all over everything inside. I never figured out his thought process behind that he even shut the drawer and put the syrup back in the fridge."

Noelle Robbins Gongwer

7. “She spent the next two months…”

"When my oldest was four she had dark peach fuzz on the tops of her ears and back. One day I told her how hairy she was, being silly. She then decided she was a werewolf and spent the next two months running around barking and howling at the moon."

Samm Gedo

8. “He was rubbing it all over his face and body.”

"I'd put my one-and-a-half-year-old son on the counter next to a brand new Costco-sized margarine tub as I prepped some toast. I turned around for a second to look for my butter knife, and when I looked back my son had put BOTH of his hands into the margarine and was rubbing it all over his face and body."

Camille La Bisbille Archambault-Bouliane

9. “Mmmmmmmmm.”

"When our youngest was about two she would go up behind my husband and sniff, as if he farted, and go, ‘Mmmmmmmm.'"

DeAnna Martin Totman

10. For the dogs.

"My two-year-old likes to put his plate of food on the floor and eat it like our dog."

Ashli Shockley

11. “THAT LADY TOOK MY EYE!”

"I was in a bridal shop that had a short row of large mirrors, watching a friend try on a dress. My then three-year-old saw a sales lady go behind the row of mirrors and followed her. When I called for him, he reappeared with his hand over one eye, pretending to stagger, and yelling, ‘MY EYE! THAT LADY TOOK MY EYE!' I was mortified. P.S His eye was fine."

Elizabeth Cupertino

#12 “Her real parents were in the mountains.”

"My now five-year-old used to tell us that we weren't her real parents her real parents were in the mountains, but bad people stole her. She would tell us how she missed them and ask if we could take her back."

Rebecca Siegfried

#13 Fun, fun, fun.

"My four-year-old asked if we could play that we're folding laundry at the beach."

Robin Arnesen Dahlgren

#14 “Steve.”

"My four-year-old son recently started having an imaginary friend, Steve. Steve constantly needs his hand held when we go to the store or cross the road. This, of course, just looks like my son with his arm out.

One day a person ‘ran into' Steve and ‘hurt' him so badly that my son had a breakdown in the middle of an aisle. He was still screaming to get Steve a doctor by calling 911 while I was taking him out of the store."

Jodie Baglole

#15 Breakfast of…champions?

"My three-year-old loves ketchup. She will eat pancakes with ketchup instead of syrup."

Sandra Torres

#16 “Tyrone.”

"When my daughter was three she told Santa her name was ‘Tyrone.' After some weird looks from Santa and his helpers I explained that she was a big fan of The Backyardigans and that her real name is ‘Libby.'"

Elisabeth Phelps

#17 Zom-baby.

"My three-year-old daughter loves to walk around pretending she's a zombie in public. She groans with her arms completely stretched out and her head tilted to the side."

Courtney Yahner

#18 “Then blew it in my face.”

"My five-year-old son recently cupped his palm, farted in his hand, smiled at me, and then blew it in my face like a kiss."

Kelle Tansmore

#19 “My nephew suddenly had gum.”

"My nephew suddenly had chewing gum at a restaurant, so I asked him where the hell he got it from. He said, ‘Oh, from under the table.'"

April Porras

#20 Um, uh, well…

"My kid pulled his pants down and pooped on the floor at the grocery store while I was paying."

Leyinzca Bihlajama

#21 Twerk it.

"Our six-year-old son can't stop twerking."

Araceli G Martinez

#22 How weird?

"I was washing dishes when my five-year-old daughter walked in and said, ‘Guess how weird it is to ride a Time Pony?' I said, ‘I don't know. Pretty weird?' She answered, ‘No. Just 1% weird.' And walked away."

Angie Clifton Marshall