Naomi Judd's Mental Illness And Why She Is Estranged From Wynona

#1 Naomi Juss Is Suffering With A Crippling Depression

Naomi Judd is revealing the crippling depression that had her ready to kill herself and how her mental illness turned into a family tragedy. The country star is revealing her harrowing mental breakdown in her new memoir, "River of Time: My Descent Into Depression and How I Emerged With Hope." She also reveals some other secrets like how her two superstar daughters Wynonna and Ashley also endured their own crippling bouts of depression.

#2 She Promoted Her Book ON ABC-TV

The performer recently visited ABC News and Good Morning America to discuss her swollen appearance and other side effects from her life-threatening battle with 'severe treatment-resistant depression. She didn't pull any punches while revealing the depths of her own misery. "I wanted to be completely honest that if someone took out a gun and killed me on stage," she wrote about one concert, "they would be doing me a favor. But I didn't. I was there to inspire them and I could not let them down."

#3 Medications Have Turned Her Into A Monster

"I don't look like I usually look. My hands shake real bad, medication, nothing I can do about it,' the retired country crooner, who turns 71 next month told ABC News. She tried to explain some of her obvious distorted actions, and appearance "And my face, I feel like a balloon. My face is all swollen because the medication. I really haven't been eating ice-cream and candy. I really haven't." She continued, "The meds have basically turned me into a monster but if I don't take them I am afraid of what the outcome will be."

#4 She's Been Depressed For Many Years

She revealed that The Judds' reunion tour of 2010 ultimately brought her to the brink of despair, and was so overwhelmed that she had to seek treatment in psychiatric hospitals. In addition to drowning in misery, Naomi says she also suffered from fearsome panic attacks, PTSD, toxic drug poisoning and addiction. But the future superstar first thought about ending it all when she was a single gal pregnant with Wynonna!

#5 She Is Not The Happy Person Seen On Stage As She Is In Real Life

"They think because they see me in rhinestones, you know, with glitter in my hair, that really is who I am. I'm sort of a fantasy because I want to provide that for them,' Judd explained to Robin Roberts. "But then I would come home and not leave the house for three weeks and not get out of my pajamas, not practice normal hygiene. It was really bad."

#6 She Had A Troubled Start To Life

Born Diana, on Kentucky, she changed her name when her oldest daughter, now Wynona, began performing and recording. She says her depression began when Wynona was born and nobody was there to assist her in raising her two daughters. She said that at the age of 3 she was molested by an Uncle and nobody believed her.

#7 Had Two Failed Suicide Attempts

She attempted suicide twice while with her first child, Naomi confessed but changed her mind both times. "At least suicide would make everyone feel sorry for me," Naomi said later. Despite the popularity of The Judds and the millions of records they've sold, Naomi would go on to a hard life full of-of ups and downs. Naomi would end up raising both Winona and Ashley as a single parent, gracing her children with talent but burdening them with their own dark secrets.

#8 Wynona Suffers ith A Deep Depression Of Her Own

Their chaotic upbringing chaos drove singer Wynonna to pack on the pounds and take to her bed on several occasions with a diagnosis of depression herself, while actress Ashley was left with emotional scars that required serious therapy. "It wasn't until Wynonna and Ashley became adults that the demons of their youth came back to haunt them," Naomi revealed. "They blamed me for their problems, and I have held that burden my whole life."

#9 A Divorce Led The Girls To Travel All Over The Country

Desperately driven to make a name for herself and Wynonna in the country music world, Naomi dragged her daughters from state to state in the back seat of a beat-up old station wagon, getting jobs wherever they could to eat. They were dogged by poverty after Naomi's divorce from Mike Ciminella, Ashley's father, and the man Wynonna was falsely led to believe was her dad!

#10 Wynona Has Trouble Forgiving Her Mother

Years later, Wynonna learned her mother had been living a lie. By then, Wynonna had already survived an earlier depression brought on when Naomi was diagnosed with the potentially fatal disease hepatitis C and retired, leaving Wynonna to make it on her own in the cutthroat music business. She took several years off before retiring three different times and then releasing new music. Her depression has left her to herself lately and she rarely sees or speaks to her sick mother. Wynona blames her mother for her illness because she never got to meet her father, a childhood sweetheart of Naomi's, and was led to believe Ashleys father was hers as well.

#11 Wynona And Naomi Remain Estranged

"I love her but there are just times we need a break from one another. We're still a little estranged from each other, and that happens with mothers and daughters," the mother-of-two explained about her estrangement from her one-time singing partner. She said the two have been "apart" now for longer than they have ever been.

#12 Her Life Is Falling Apart But Ashley Is Keeping Her On Track

The five-time Grammy winner and CMA winner has recently filed for divorce from long=time husband and confidant Larry Strickland. She says that the couple have just drifted apart and blames her mental illness rather than anything Strickland has done wrong. But while her life appears to be falling apart, her youngest daughter Ashley is sticking by her side and not letting her do things she will later regret. But Ashley has issues of her own as well.

#13 Ashley Went Through Years Of Therapy In The Past

While Naomi and Wynonna found fame, Ashley struggled as a hostess in Las Angeles restaurants. After finding success in hit movies like "Kiss The Girls," she still felt lonely and left out. "She cried for hours at a time and felt antisocial and overly sensitive," confided a showbiz insider. "When weeks turned into months, she realized she was suffering from depression. This forced her to confront issues from her dysfunctional childhood."

#14 Ashley Never Felt Love From Her Family

Ashley finally mustered up the courage to confront Naomi and Wynonna and reveal her bottled-up anger. "You walk to the edge and you stand there and look down into the abyss and things come out of you," she said, crediting her old boyfriend pop singer Michael Bolton with giving her the strength to face her problems. She says that she only felt love from Bolton, unlike any she ever felt from her own family. In the meantime, Ashley is working tirelessly to get her mother and sister together again before it is too late.

#15 Naomi Hopes Her Book Will Help Others Suffering And Struggling With Emotional Conflicts

Naomi has not performed or recorded any music since 2003 when she did a duet with Wynona and arranged a comeback tour. She has however written several books including a children's book. She admitted on GMA that she lied in her book River of Time, where she goes into some detail about her beginning of her mental illness, about Wynona's real father and regrets it deeply now.

The singer-turned-author is also hoping to connect with a new audience. She wants her readers to know that there's hope for people struggling with depression and thoughts of suicide. She said, "You can come out of this. I did!"