While there are some men who manage to navigate the world without falling back on these tired stereotypes, it’s pretty unlikely that any woman of adult age has gone her entire life without hearing one of these from multiple dudes in her life. And instead of us having to swat them away like gnats every time they come up, it would be cool if there could be some guy-on-guy education along the lines of “Hey, stop saying this stuff about women. It’s lame.”
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#1 Women don’t even like sex
To imply that women don’t like sex, that a full 50 percent of the population is not interested in one of our most basic and pleasurable human functions, is a total cop out for what is in reality a very complicated and personal thing. (And, yes, this may be an unfortunate thing to consider, but sometimes a woman who otherwise enjoys sex is driven into not wanting it because her partner(s) know nothing about her anatomy and cannot give her an orgasm, yet expect her to have one routinely.)
#2 Are you on your period?
There is nothing worse than this question? People who assume that a woman must be presently bleeding from her vagina to feel anything left of “passively calm” on the human emotion spectrum, maybe she is. Do you understand that the process of having a period is not just a delicate transition from “normal existence” to “pleasant reminder that you are fertile and reproductively healthy” necessitating only the coquettish insertion of a tampon? Do you understand that cramps are real, that hormones have tangible effects, and general fatigue can be so strong as to make the regular work day extremely difficult? She’s probably not on her period, statistically — but even if she was, GOOD FOR HER FOR BEING ANYWHERE BUT IN HER BED EATING PRINGLES. She doesn’t need your shit.
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#3 Insert intended-to-be-devastating comment about her appearance here
No matter how unimportant her physical appearance is to her job, there will be a constant influx of men who feel that the most effective way to upset her is to call her fat or ugly.
But to assume that she cares what you think about her waistline or her smile is to give yourself way, way too much credit.
#4 She’s too sweet to be a boss
There is a tendency in many men to make the division between the schoolmarmy Hillary Clintons of the world, and the stand-in mother figures who will spruce up the office like a particularly joyous plant but never be an actual source of competition.
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#5 She has daddy issues
What an awful thing to say, even if it were true. Either she actually does have a traumatic past with her father and you are making light of it by condescendingly ascribing all of her personal problems to it and referring to him repulsively as her “daddy,” or you are falsely assuming that there could be no source of dysfunction in women’s relationships that wasn’t another man.
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#6 Girls never get along with each other
Girl-on-girl platonic relationships are something very precious and important. (And despite what the Real Housewives might indicate, most of us have hobbies outside of drinking rosé and calling one another sluts. At least, most of the time.)
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#7 She’s not like other girls
If you have to compliment one woman by putting her gender down, you are doing it wrong. And there’s no more intricate explanation than that, you’re just a fool.
