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#1 Am I doing this right or wrong?
#2 OMG! Are they doing this right?
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#3 Clearly, one of us is doing something wrong right now.
#4 Maybe I am overthinking this right now.
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#5 How do I tell them, gently, to stop doing what they are doing right now?
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#6 I have never been so aware of my tongue before.
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#7 Or anyone else’s tongue, for that matter.
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#8 Should I do it myself, or is that too “thirsty?”
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#9 Why are they looking at my stomach like that? I AM VERY SELF-CONSCIOUS ABOUT MY STOMACH, AND THEY KNOW THAT.
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#10 What sort of, um, sounds should one be making right now?
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#11 Okay. We’re done. How do I end this? Would a high-five be weird?
