Woman Refuses to Cancel Trip, Causes Husband to Miss Daughter's Prom

"AITA for my husband missing his daughter's prom?"

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"I (36 female) have been married to my husband Josh (40) for 10 years. We have a 9-year-old daughter, Lauren, together, and my stepdaughter Riley is 18."

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OP had planned a trip with her friends a year before these events came to pass

"About a year ago, I booked a vacation with my girlfriends for one of their bachelorette parties. It's this weekend in Tennessee. We leave Thursday and come back Monday."

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"This weekend, Lauren has a cheerleading competition that Josh is taking her to. Lauren is required to have a guardian there the whole time, and she needs to arrive early Friday and leave Sunday. We did ask the cheer director if a friend's mom could bring her and my husband could meet her thereafter, but they said no. And if she's not there for the check-in time, she can't compete that weekend."

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Unfortunately, her daughter and stepdaughter happened to have important events on those very dates. The school refused to have anyone other than the parents chaperone.

"Riley's prom is Friday. Riley did not have a junior prom, and her school only has a senior prom. We found out the date of prom after school started, and the trip had already been booked and paid for."

With everyone having prior plans, the family had reached an impasse where at least one member would have to sacrifice important time.

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"My husband is now going to be missing Riley's prom to take Lauren to her competition."

"Riley thinks this is extremely unfair and that we're playing favorites since she'll never get this chance again, and she wants pictures with her dad and sister. She's been messaging my husband about it."

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Of course, the elder daughter saw this as clear favoritism with her father opting to go to the competition rather than her prom.

OP's husband, now split between two daughters asked if OP would cancel her trip and take their daughter to the competition instead.

"Lauren doesn't want to miss her competition and risk her spot on her team."

"My husband asked if I'd cancel my trip, and I told him no. The trip has been booked, paid for, and I also need a break. He takes breaks and trips as well."

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"My husband and I are now fighting because he feels like no matter what he does, he's stuck. He's already told Lauren he'll be taking her to the cheer comp, which means he'll be missing prom."

"So AITA?"

OP refused to do so, leading to a fight when she refused to back down.

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OP stood her ground and decided to take the trip anyway.

"Update:

"I have decided to stand my ground that I will not be canceling my trip. I will be getting on the plane in the morning."

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"Josh just sat down with me, Riley, and Lauren to talk about the weekend. He explained he'll be taking Lauren to her competition while Riley's mother takes pictures with her at prom. He said he taught the girls about commitment and he's not going to have Lauren's absence have the team forfeit."

Ultimately, OP's husband decided to sit his daughter down and let her know he'd be missing prom because he had already committed to the cheer competition.

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"He told her we could do pictures if she wanted to put her dress on a second time, but she said it won't be the same and she's upset."

"Riley is upset with her father and thinks he's favoring Lauren."

They asked if she'd be happy to take pictures later but she refused.

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In her update, OP revealed that the husband did in fact leave for the cheer competition.

"Update 2:

"My husband just called me, and he decided to leave with Lauren to the cheer competitions after breakfast so that they could have lunch and relax before meeting up with her team. They are officially safe at the hotel for the competition."

"Thank you for all the support we've received and even for the negative comments."

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His daughter however was still upset that he wouldn't be there for prom.

"Update 3:

"Riley had Senior Prom last weekend and looked beautiful. She took pictures with her mom and friends. We did offer to do pictures again with her this weekend, but she's chosen not to. She said it won't be the same, and we're respecting her feelings about that. Thank you to everyone for that suggestion, though."

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"Lauren's team placed at the cheerleading competition, so they will be getting ready for the next competition."

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Comments this time were split multiple ways with some considering everyone's perspective.

"NAH.

"Whomever is organizing the cheerleader competition is the asshole. There is no reason they should restrict another member of the family from bringing her, or simply allowing her to go with another parent and a permission slip."

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Others however thought OP was being unreasonable.

"Also, YTA as is your husband. Prom happens once. Your 9-year-old has plenty of cheerleading competitions. The focus should be the once-in-a-lifetime deal. No wonder your stepdaughter is totally pissed. Do better."

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Some thought that prom wasn't as big of a deal as people made it out to be.

"I don't get why everyone is acting like an adult's world needs to revolve around prom. I remember who I went to prom with, I don't remember the hour at my house beforehand where the parents insisted on taking photos. I know for a fact some of the parents weren't there for the photos because they had to work or do other stuff. It's prom, not a wedding or a graduation. Prom is about the kids spending time with each other; it's not a family event."

Some chalked it down to teenage dramatics.

"I'm sorry, but Riley is upset because she can't get a photo with her Dad before she takes off for a party? Maybe because we don't have 'prom' where I live, I am failing to see how this is some big life event. It's not her graduation, not her wedding. It's a photo in a dress. She will not be alone; her mother will be there. Teenagers are dramatic. NTA."

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